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People are not difficult; they're just different!

Have you ever had a conversation at work that turned heated and you didn’t really understand why? Or even got frustrated because someone didn’t do what you thought they said they would?

Of course you have, we all do from time to time.

It’s easy to then label the other person as difficult but in our experience it’s rarely that they are being truly difficult, it is more that they are different to us. In the busyness and high pressure stakes of our working world maybe you simply haven’t had the time to work out what they need from you; yet and as few of us have the luxury of working in glorious isolation, this is a skill that is crucial to develop.

It's all a matter of perspective

On the other hand, I bet you’ve said (at times) how lucky you are to be working with some amazing people too. But you know what, these people aren’t actually extraordinarily good, they are ordinary people who you or maybe even the situation have enabled to be incredible. So if we add these two things together, maybe there are no difficult people, just situations that help people be exceptional or difficult. It’s all a matter of perspective.

Those with the greatest flexibility have the greatest choices.

This is a poster from our workshops that often gets people talking.

The old saying ‘treat people as you would like to be treated’ can be a recipe for failure. We need to treat people as they need to be treated to get the results we want. If we can focus on their needs first we enhance our flexibility and therefore our choices.

The challenge is that as soon as you see someone as difficult, it becomes emotional; you expect a battle and you can guess what outcome you get from there, right?

So here are some top tips to help you get those extraordinary results.


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